Choosing Discernment Over Desire

One of the hardest things I see young Christian people face when it comes to romantic relationships is the fact that we think we won’t be attracted to those who are not Christians. The reality is that this is not true, and it happens all the time. It’s so easy to find yourself attracted to someone, but your mind tells you that he or she isn’t right for you. Yet, you choose to follow what your heart says rather than use your discernment. It’s shocking, right? It’s amazing how easily you can tell yourself, “I know this isn’t right, but I want it to be.” So, you turn that person into someone who could potentially be a great follower of Christ. You begin to think that you can change the person when, in reality, that’s not your job.

For those who are struggling with this, it’s not a bad thing to feel attracted to someone, but if you’re looking to get married, it’s important to marry someone with similar beliefs. That is one thing that can build a strong foundation. Also, wouldn’t you want a partner you can pray with and someone who helps bring you closer to God? Of course you would, but you might mask that because you find someone outside the church to be sweet and pretty. That makes sense, and you might think that because they seem like they carry all this grace, they’re right for you. When really, as time goes on, you’re going to wish you had never stepped foot in that relationship.

As sad as that might sound, it’s important to remember that a relationship built on physical attraction alone never works anyway. This is where it’s important to build a stronger relationship with the Lord and trust what He has planned. Sometimes, I might wonder how on earth Christians end up dating and getting into relationships with unbelievers and acting on that desire. But I have come to realize that just because you might believe in God and are a Christian doesn’t mean you’re immune to temptation.

Despite all this, you will find yourself at times drifting from what you know is right. It’s interesting how a lot of us struggle with wanting a romantic relationship, but seem to continue to put our relationship with God lower on the list of relationships we work on. This is also a great example of how having a relationship with Christ doesn’t feel like hearts and butterflies all the time. In fact, most of the time, you might feel like God isn’t even there, even though He always is. If you want to be in a Christian relationship, you’ve got to ask yourself these kinds of questions.

It may sound like a lot, but you will feel more at peace with someone who shares the same beliefs as you. It’s amazing when it all works out that way, because then you no longer have to stress or think about being someone’s savior. On a side note, never again will you have to sit conflicted about those core values. Well, it’s not as easy as that, but think about how wonderful it would be to sit with someone and just pray with them. Or even read the Bible together, as well as strengthen your relationship with God together. Once you have those things going, you could be in a very beautiful relationship, and it could even lead to marriage.

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